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UNREFINED PALETTE AND UNCENSORED MOUTH

Monday, February 10, 2014

Diet Soda Battle


(Here's the deal: I really like diet soda. Which is sort of ironic because I don't particularly enjoy any diet food. But, in the world of carbonated beverages, I prefer aspartame over full-on, viscous-quantifying sugar.)


I went to CVS late last night, in search of some new hair plumping products. This is the type of thing I do after I see someone with great hair. In this case, Sophia Bush on Chicago PD. I sent a text to my friend Natalie, who has hair that rivals that of Officer Erin Lindsay, and she recommended a mousse and root booster. But, the brands she suggested are only available at Ulta and Sephora.

So, after unsuccessfully searching the haircare aisle, I decided to get a soda and milk chocolate M&M's before returning home. I walked over to the refrigerated lockers and nonchalantly perused the partitioned-off units for my diet drink of choice.

After a few seconds, I involuntarily grabbed a Diet Dr. Pepper. Then I paused. I started thinking. What is it about Diet Dr. Pepper that had me drawn to it? Usually, I am Mystique by palate and prefer variety and change. I look for things that appeal to my metamorphism of taste. So, why do I always go with Diet DP?

I was living the exact opposite of the Michele Mackay lesson in D2, I wasn't changing it up. (I can't go back on a mantra like that.) Therefore, in an attempt to justify my choice, I decided to buy two other soda brands and compare. I had to figure it out. Was my staple purchase of Diet Dr. Pepper actually satisfying my cola fix or was I merely comforted by Dr. Pepper's familiarity?

I placed a 16 oz of Diet DP, Diet Coke, and Diet Pepsi into my handheld shopping basket. I was now on a mission. I straightened my grip on the shopping tote and made my way to the center of the store.

Wait.... 

Yep, I still want candy, I thought to myself, as I pivoted toward the seasonal Valentine's Day section.

I turned down the pink and red colored aisle. There were no hot guys shopping for their significant others, so my single relationship status wasn't bruised. I only spotted a frail, older woman whose dainty arms were propped against her red shopping cart. She smiled a peach-pie grin as I squeezed gingerly between the shelf and her buggy. I plopped a rosy bag of Valentine's Day M&M's on top of the chilled soda bottles and headed to the register. Candy fix satisfied. Back to my mission. 

Diet Dr. Pepper vs Diet Coke vs Diet Pepsi 
"Allez cuisine!"


When it comes to the packaging, I pick Pepsi. The bottle is more sophisticated. The minimalist logo pairs well with the bold faced font, and the slender bottle height has more of a resemblance to smart water i.e. that healthy life. The quirky calligraphy writing of the other two are slightly annoying. So, in terms of sleek savoir faire, team Pepsi. 

On the taste: Even though they are cut from the same artificially sweetened cloth, all diet sodas do not taste the same.

Spectrum of Sweetness: 
Diet Dr. Pepper > Diet Pepsi > Diet Coke 

Diet Coke: This is honestly my least favorite. DC has salty nuances with interspersed aspartame flavor. If you take a sip of Diet Coke then Diet DP, it is like drinking an Americano before a Caramel Macchiato at Starbucks, minus the extra calories. Plus, I think it is infused with more carbon dioxide; the coke bubbles and froths in your mouth more than the others. Not bad. Just not great.  

Diet Pepsi: Pepsi falls in the middle on the totem of sweetness. I forgot how much I enjoy Diet Pepsi! It has a sugary flavor but is balanced by tang and citric undertones. As far as carbonation, it is hard to determine, as this bottle seems somewhat flat. I had to shake it like an artesania painted maraca for fizz to perforate at the top.
 
Diet Dr. Pepper: I untwisted the Diet DP and began sipping it with the pleasure of a teenager sneaking a swig of Strawberry Hill Boone's Farm. I love how Diet DP maintains an authentic sweet flavor while still coexisting in perfect harmony with the artificial non-saccharine. Additional gulps provide hints of cherry and vanilla finished with a foamy soda taste.

Winner: Diet Dr. Pepper
(I'm not, in fact, muted by the habitual taste of my go-to soda, or swayed by an allegiance toward a Texas made product.)

All in all, I think it depends on which side of the sugary spectrum you swing. To each his own. I just prefer the taste of Diet DP. It's probably because I'm so sweet. xx.

P.S. This caffeine overload has me acting dumb. I'm trying to reenact a Newsies number with my cat, Ari. Much love from our “Seize the Day” production. Big smiles. muah!  

REVENGE FANS: I'm ready for Emily to quit being a fool this season.

*Spoiler Alert*

Dearest Emily Rebecca Thorne-Grayson,

I understand you got shot by your husband and everything. So, I'm going to chalk up your current state as an inappropriate physical reaction to becoming barren at 27 via GSW to the abdomen. But, I think is it time to bring back the plucky persona. Ninja time, girl!

Lovingly,
Britt

3 comments:

  1. Now I want a regular DP and peanut m&ms!

    ReplyDelete